2011 has so far been quite an interesting year for me. I've taken some time lately to reflect on what I experienced and learned thus far on my journey. I've been fortunate enough to have some time alone, in silence and in stillness. The following is what surfaced and stood out. Some are very light hearted and some are more serious. It's a mix of it all.
This past year I learned that:
- Where you invest your love you invest your life. Thank you Mumford and Sons :)
- That if you wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle enough, you will find your inner mojo every time. Thank you LMFAO, lol.
- That earth angels truly exist. You just have to let go of the Ego and allow yourself to see them. Thank you Vicki, my eternal angel.
- Happiness is not found in another person, place or thing. That looking for joy in the external is a very exhausting and futile endeavour. I'm tired of that and done with it. Happiness must begin within.
- Cats are just as amazing as dogs! You just have to remember they can climb on counter tops, open fridges, and still love you when they go off on their own and want their space. Thank you to Ozzy and Bailes.
- That HIV and Cancer are not death sentences! That we are remarkable human miracles that can heal, and regain wellness when we truly face the real problem-emotional and spiritual dis-ease.
- From my HIV clients: That we are greater than our labels, our perceptions and those of others, and our past. From those less fortunate than I: I learned that we all have gifts to give and share no matter how poor, unemployed, sick or "different" we may be.
- That you are the company you keep! There is no getting around this one. The circle of friends you hang out with and surround yourself with, says VOLUMES about you, your own beliefs, and what you ACCEPT in your life.
- That I'm REALLY REALLY REALLY thankful that I did not give in to the pressure to fit in or be cool in my teens and twenties and enter into the party drug scene. I used to wonder if I missed out on that so called "fun" and perhaps led too straight of life. But the universe blessed me with the confirmation that I truly took the better highway.
- That chocolate can be eaten in moderation, in even the worst of times. It actually is a more special experience when I don't over indulge too often :) which leads me to...
- Too much vino, too much vegetarian, too much healthiness, too much of anything or anyone does not serve me well. The lesson of balance keeps coming back to haunt me. And it's good, I need to be hit over the head with this one!
- That dating in your 30s is a huge TEST to your patience and SANITY. I'm still working on this. Actually joking aside, I'm happy and proud to admit I didn't settle just because everyone else was getting married, or moving on or having kids.
- More on dating... That when he doesn't call you back, he really is sane and doing you a favour. It's far worse to be called 10x a day, texted 50 times with freaky messages, and emailed proposals of the future he sees with you, within 7 days of meeting the weirdo. WOW thank God that is over.
- And on a more serious note about dating partners: That my sense of spirituality is very important to me, and I will not negotiate it, or downplay it, or jeopardize it for anyone. That I want to be able to share similar spiritual beliefs with my mate.
- AND...That I respect my body by aiming to eat clean, exercise daily, not drink excessively or smoke, and leading an overall active lifestyle and I want my potential companion to also share and practice these same values. I've overlooked this for some reason lately. I'm letting go of that denial.
- That religion is something you just don't discuss with religious people. Therefore I will avoid to the best of my ability to speak of religion with those who only believe in their religion and have no respect for the beliefs of others. This includes priests, deacons, rabbis, rectors, Imams and Mothers. (Note: Being religious is not the same as being spiritual.)
- That true friends are there for you anytime, any day, any week or any month. They are there regardless of the past, or what was said or not said, and not only when it's most convenient for them.
- That being alone and being lonely are two very different things. Being lonely at times is normal. However feeling alone in life, is debilitating and risks one's health.
- That I can't "save" anyone from themselves or their self destructiveness. Salvation comes from finding the love within and giving it out.
- That my body may not be perfect, but boy does it do amazingly perfect things. I get reminded of this more and more. Like the way it knows when I've had too much Baci Perugine chocolates or chickpeas.
- That a good Cesar is hard to find in this city! Come on people, how hard is it to mix tomato juice with some alcohol and the right spice.
- That a rainy, cold or grey day isn't so bad if you have a cappuccino, a good book and a warm blanket. I'm blessed to have all of those at my disposal. There are many who don't.
- That Toronto isn't so bad. We have been spared natural disasters and destruction, for the most part are tolerant of diversity (I excuse and forgive the one woman on bloor west who took the liberty of calling me a wop), and the CN tower is one hell of a sexy masterpiece. Thank you to the immigrants who built it :)
- From my dad: You are as old as the colour of your hair. Thank God for Just for Men hair dye. Kidding aside his Joie de Vie has truly taught me how vitality and youthfulness is really a result of your ability to have fun, be playful and go with the flow of life. You really are as young as you will allow yourself to feel.
- That spanish is a beautiful language to learn, but going latin dancing on a first date doesn't always mean a good time. Never doing that again. Next.
- That wherever you go, there you are. So running off to another city, country or continent doesn't mean your life problems instantaneously resolve. You can't run from yourself, your issues or the lessons you need to learn. They are here to remind you of what needs attention and care. I'm still working on this one.
- Resistance is futile. Let go and Let God. Also working on this one :)
When are we ever done?
Wishing you the best end of this 2011, and an amazing 2012!!! Ole'!!