Sunday, January 29, 2012

Wherever you go there you are.

We can't run away from ourselves. We convince ourselves that by moving to another place, leaving a job, going on a vacation, running to the gym or the fridge will solve the problem. At best they serve as coping mechanisms for the psyche and temporarily give a sense of relief so we don't feel like we will fall apart entirely on the spot.

Running away from ourselves eventually brings us right back to facing ourselves again. Most often its pretty abrupt too boot. Seems ironic? Well, you just can't run to anywhere, or to anything and believe all those tangled webs you weaved will magically go away. Wherever you go, there you are.

You bring all the yucky, painful or messy stuff, which you believe is not yours, but theirs, with you wherever you go. Ever wonder why you attract similar situations and relationships in your life? If you don't do the unraveling of those inner webs of your own issues, it won't matter which relationship, job or geographical location you jump into next. Because you will still be operating through the filter of those webs.

I'm not dissing change or believe we can't start new chapters in our lives. But from what energy or place are you starting the change from? Begin the change from a place of Self love and self respect and you have a solid ground to move from. Growth relies on change. And the change must be one you make from within, and how you see your world and circumstances.

We keep wanting to change the other. This could be our significant love partner, a family member, a boss, or friend. It's completely futile. Either leave the relationship and let go entirely of its history, or look within to see what is it in you that gets triggered when the other does or says something that displeases you. Do you perhaps do the same?

Remember this isn't about self blame. I'm not promoting that at all. Our relationships are MIRRORS to our own selves. When you look at another, you see only through your own filters, bias, perceptions and "stuff". When you clear your "stuff", everything and everyone starts to look different.

No one can make you feel disrespected, hurt, less than, not enough, unattractive, depressed or the many other various emotions or states we can experience. They just can't. If we allow our thoughts to define everything we do, we become completely identified with a false entity. Which in psychology is called the Ego. The Ego can be really nasty when its left to its own devices.

That has to stop.

Start to sit still and in silence. Sit with yourself, stop running away and just be there for you. We seem to be there for everyone else, and yet we aren't giving the most important person the time to be and heard.

What happens when you don't acknowledge the needs of child and ignore them? They suffer from neglect and all the ramifications of not being loved. We do this to ourselves day after day after day.

This has to stop.

My suggestion- develop a practical mediation practice you can incorporate daily. Even just 5 minutes morning and night is profoundly healing.

Sitting meditation practice helps us to first become aware of our mind, its nature and its insanity. With time you learn you don't have to partake in that insanity. You can just observe it and let it go, and move on to what brings you real joy in life. You are not those negative thoughts the mind will have you believe you are. Have compassion for all of you, and watch how your life soars in awesome directions you didn't think were possible.

You are the beautiful essence that lies still and so centred at your very core. An essence that is eternal, all knowing, and infallible. That too is with you wherever you go :)

In health always,



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