Tuesday, January 31, 2012

What if you waited 24 hours?

Currently I'm writing a book about healing and it outlines a program I have created based on the cases I've seen in practice and from years of reading eastern philosophical and medical literature.

Osho is one of my great inspirations, as his work is profoundly insightful and universally relevant to all people. He is one of the few mystics that didn't claim guru status or claimed he was divinely sent here.

In a discussion he gave, he mentioned an interesting way to process one's own anger. He told a story about a man who told his son to wait 24 hours before reacting to someone who instilled anger within him. After waiting 24 hours, he was told to just say and respond with whatever came to him in that moment.

Just think about that.

What if one waited 24 hours before lashing out on their spouse because they forgot to take out the garbage? What if one waited 24 hours before taking it out on the kids because they had a brutal day at work? What if one waited 24 hours before insulting, belittling, or throwing something back at another's face out of irrational anger ? What if we waited even 2 minutes before lashing out on restaurant server because they may have mistaken our order?

I bet the response would be quite a distinctly less abrasive one. Perhaps 24 hours would allow one to remember we all are human and capable of making mistakes. Perhaps 24 hours would allow one to access their compassionate muscles and clearly yet kindly state how they felt hurt or what they couldn't accept from the other. More significantly, maybe 24 hours would allow someone to remember they too could have done the same thing, given the same situation and that perhaps the other didn't harbour malicious intentions against them to begin with.

Give it a go.

Next time someone fails to meet your "expectations", or you feel angered by what they said or didn't say or what they did or didn't do, wait 24 hours before doing or saying anything. This may take quite some effort if you typically are one to instantly rage back. You may feel this may weaken you or create the doormat stance, but essentially you are empowering yourself instead of giving it away to the other.

Here's why:

The moment you lash out, or react to another you have communicated out of your Ego and thus your smaller self. You have signalled to the other that they have the power to trigger you and set you off your balance.

The more core connected you are, the greater is your sense of self esteem, power and worth. When you stray from that center, you actually become weak and operate from a place of fear. Anyone who is angry, is actually a very scared person. It's a method of compensating to hide that internal insecurity they are so vehemently trying to deny.

24 hours may give you the time to take some deep breaths, feel the compassion within you and ultimately operate through the love in your heart. Which is essentially the answer to all of our suffering.

What a world it would be if we even just took a moment to stop, and take a full breath before jumping the gun. Perhaps love would be given the space to come through and heal the hurt. Perhaps we might discover how possible it is to let go and let love do its job.

In health always,



Sunday, January 29, 2012

Wherever you go there you are.

We can't run away from ourselves. We convince ourselves that by moving to another place, leaving a job, going on a vacation, running to the gym or the fridge will solve the problem. At best they serve as coping mechanisms for the psyche and temporarily give a sense of relief so we don't feel like we will fall apart entirely on the spot.

Running away from ourselves eventually brings us right back to facing ourselves again. Most often its pretty abrupt too boot. Seems ironic? Well, you just can't run to anywhere, or to anything and believe all those tangled webs you weaved will magically go away. Wherever you go, there you are.

You bring all the yucky, painful or messy stuff, which you believe is not yours, but theirs, with you wherever you go. Ever wonder why you attract similar situations and relationships in your life? If you don't do the unraveling of those inner webs of your own issues, it won't matter which relationship, job or geographical location you jump into next. Because you will still be operating through the filter of those webs.

I'm not dissing change or believe we can't start new chapters in our lives. But from what energy or place are you starting the change from? Begin the change from a place of Self love and self respect and you have a solid ground to move from. Growth relies on change. And the change must be one you make from within, and how you see your world and circumstances.

We keep wanting to change the other. This could be our significant love partner, a family member, a boss, or friend. It's completely futile. Either leave the relationship and let go entirely of its history, or look within to see what is it in you that gets triggered when the other does or says something that displeases you. Do you perhaps do the same?

Remember this isn't about self blame. I'm not promoting that at all. Our relationships are MIRRORS to our own selves. When you look at another, you see only through your own filters, bias, perceptions and "stuff". When you clear your "stuff", everything and everyone starts to look different.

No one can make you feel disrespected, hurt, less than, not enough, unattractive, depressed or the many other various emotions or states we can experience. They just can't. If we allow our thoughts to define everything we do, we become completely identified with a false entity. Which in psychology is called the Ego. The Ego can be really nasty when its left to its own devices.

That has to stop.

Start to sit still and in silence. Sit with yourself, stop running away and just be there for you. We seem to be there for everyone else, and yet we aren't giving the most important person the time to be and heard.

What happens when you don't acknowledge the needs of child and ignore them? They suffer from neglect and all the ramifications of not being loved. We do this to ourselves day after day after day.

This has to stop.

My suggestion- develop a practical mediation practice you can incorporate daily. Even just 5 minutes morning and night is profoundly healing.

Sitting meditation practice helps us to first become aware of our mind, its nature and its insanity. With time you learn you don't have to partake in that insanity. You can just observe it and let it go, and move on to what brings you real joy in life. You are not those negative thoughts the mind will have you believe you are. Have compassion for all of you, and watch how your life soars in awesome directions you didn't think were possible.

You are the beautiful essence that lies still and so centred at your very core. An essence that is eternal, all knowing, and infallible. That too is with you wherever you go :)

In health always,



Tuesday, January 24, 2012

South American Healing Herbs: Heal fatigue, weight loss, hormones and your mood!

The hot smooth dancers, spicy flavours and tastes, deep intense vino and a whole lot of sensual flare can describe the best of South America and it's vibrant culture.

AND that's not all! They are healing masters!

I'm in love with Latin America. I'm in love with their zesty personalities, their hot swagger, and their spicy enchiladas!

Yes, I learned that a spicy enchilada is a true art in itself, both making it and eating it! The soft cheese melts in your mouth, the intense spice warms the insides and as an amateur I make the whole messy ordeal quite an entertaining show for the real latino pro. Napkins, lots of napkins and the help of a mexican on how to handle it, did the trick ;)

Apart from food and hot groovy dance moves, the latin countries are a mecca for healing herbs and therapeutic holistic practices. They bred the original medicine men or shamans. These are the spiritual healers who convene with the land and the ether to bring balance to dis-eased states and constitutions.

When I was in Mexico last year, I had the privilege to explore shamanic medicine and witness some great healing ceremonies. The indigenous of the South are in tune with not only the land and their surroundings, but also with the intangible essence of spirit. I saw it, I felt it and I experienced it on a level so unimaginable it truly is hard to convey in mere words and on a flat screen.

Plants are healing powerhouses!

The southern indigenous are the true "doctors" and their extensive knowledge of the plant world is mind blowing. Plants are immensely curative and precious in their healing capabilities. They are full of the life source energy of the planet, as they connect both upwards taking sun energy from above, and root downwardly bringing up the rich minerals of the soil beneath them. Utilizing them is both an art and a science, and the latin indigenous have mastered it.

I've used a number of southern american herbs both personally and with my clients. From treating hormonal imbalance, to weight issues, to digestive disorders such as gallstones, to chronic depleted states of energy and vitality, the following herbs were the best in their curative potential for these maladies.


This is by far my most loved herb of the south. I LOVE MACA!!! I am crazy infatuated by it, so much so my friends think I'm now addicted and need rehab. There are worse addictions, and I know my limits. Seriously though, it is truly a highly nutrient dense herb that is an elixir for the massive fatigue epidemic we have here in the west.

It is indigenous to the high andes of Bolivia and Peru, where it has been used to enhance energy and hormonal function for centuries.

  • Maca regulates the whole endocrine (hormonal) system and as an adaptogen it will correct your hormonal system by either lifting a depleted state or balancing out an overactive one.

  • Thyroid: it has proven to heal the thyroid function whether it is in an overactive or under active state. It thus can help with weight gain due to hormonal imbalances, especially in women!

  • For women it will regulate estrogen and progesterone and thus relieve symptoms of PMS, hot flashes and other menopausal symptoms. It is said that many indigenous women have fewer reproductive issues and also don't go into menopause till their late 60s!

  • Fibroids in women: a study by Dr. Viana Muller showed that women with large fibroids, that caused excessive menstrual bleeding, had incredible results by taking Maca daily. Their fibroids shrunk, their bleeding went to normal and they avoided hysterectomy surgery!

  • For men: Maca helps keep testosterone levels balanced, increases stamina, and has helped with erectile dysfunction. It has been hailed as the natural viagra of our times. Just be sure to take enough Zinc to help keep the prostrate healthy, and it will help the Maca assimilation as well.

  • CAUTION: Taking more is not better here. Less can be more and starting with a smaller dosage is advisable. Begin with 1 tsp a day. You can increase to 2 tsp. after a week or two. Also after being on maca for 2 months, take a whole week off and then begin again and you may need to only take it at a maintenance dose say 3-4 times a week.
  • If you have been in a chronic state of fatigue, and a depleted state it will take time to get back to your normal self. Patience, and the herb will help get you there ;)

On a personal note:

Maca has been one of the most effective healing herbs I have taken. It has brought my adrenal health and whole energy level back to an amazing state. I've taken many herbs and supplements, and nothing has come to be as effective as maca for treating low energy and a depleted iron state. This coupled with Spirulina has been miraculous for me. It did take a full 2 months to feel restored, but even after the first month my sleep, my energy and whole sense of vitality improved significantly!

Camu camu:

This is the sour power berry of the south. It is one of the highest source of pure Vitamin C in the plant world. It is thus a great anti-bacterial and anti viral supplement that supports and strengthens the immune system. It has been shown to treat even severe cases of herpes, both oral and genital outbreaks with great results.

  • Depression and Anxiety disorders: Camu camu has been used for depression and alleviating mood disorders. According to Dr Muller: " It has phytochemicals which clinically have been shown to change mood within a few hours. It can help lift depression and greatly reduce anxiety even the same day it is started. Only a tiny amount is needed--two capsules taken with water on an empty stomach twice daily or 1/4 tsp. taken in water twice daily."

Chanca piedra:

Just as the spanish name suggests, this herb "breaks stones". So it has been effectively used for those that have the tendency to develop gall stones. It has been mainly beneficial for calcium stones formed by the gallbladder, however it has helped also to support t

he liver and prepare it for gallstone release. It is less invasive than the more popular grapefruit/lemon juice olive oil cleanse. According to Dr. Muller

"Three cups a day of chanca piedra (break-stone) tea on an empty stomach for three weeks is usually very effective as a liver flush and will take out any gall stones or kidney gravel (smaller than stones) as well. At the same time, it will clean up the intestines. It truly is one of the most restorative herbs to come out of the rainforest. "

Also as a liver cleanser, it can help those looking to lose excess weight. Often times a sluggish liver can prevent even the most dedicated dieter from seeing results.

Yerba Mate:

This is one of the jewels of Argentina!

It is far superior to coffee for enhancing energy, giving you that jump you desire in the morning, and definitely improves mental focus and clarity. The beautiful thing about Mate, is that it actually elevates your energy without causing a blood insulin (sugar) crash an hour later.

It can help you power through a hard workout in the gym, or tough morning in the office, and then gradually taper off leaving you feeling good and calm even. Coffee can't even try to do that. So I've begun replacing my coffee with Mate tea and the results are truly amazing! I feel alert, without the jitters, and I can power through longer than with caffeine from java.

Weight loss: I know many of you are looking for anything that can help with weight loss, mate is also another great addition. It raises the metabolism, and your energy so you can get that daily work out in. It also helps regulate the appetite and often can diminish it dramatically. Works best on an empty stomach, first thing in the morning and at a midday.

Don't take it later than 3 or 4 pm, as it definitely can interfere with your sleep.

This is an extremely small sample of the numerous healing herbs of South America. I will continue to blog about others, as I come to research and learn them more extensively.

However the ones mentioned here are truly staples I would recommend you all keep in your medicine cabinet. Perhaps just not beside those nasty pharmaceutical concoctions. That would be almost sacrilegious, at least in my eyes. Just sayn'...

In health always,



Monday, January 16, 2012

Can Yoga hurt instead of heal?

There is a current stir in the Yoga community over a recent New York Times article titled "How Yoga can Wreck Your Body".

It is written citing Glen Black's opinion of the risks and consequences the practice of Yoga can pose the practitioner. Black is a seasoned and traditional based Yoga teacher and perhaps has taken the opportunity to plug his own business interests by creating some hot controversial debates about what Yoga can and cannot do.

Can yoga hurt instead of heal you? Most definitely.

But the better question would be:

"Is the practice of Yoga really the culprit or the Ego tendency of the human condition the real contributing factor to possible injury or risk to health?

Yoga to some degree is misunderstood here in the west. It has become a different organism, living on a different turf and challenged by the western mindset of more is better, faster will get you farther and the "no pain no gain" gym philosophy.

The practice of asana or the physical postures of Yoga are usually what we think of when we hear the word yoga. But actually it is only one part of an entire holistic system of modalities and practices that when all considered, offer one of the most healing systems available to us.

However what do we end up doing in a yoga class?

Instead of listening to our bodies we want to get farther now, and not allow the body to communicate its process.

We want to do "power yoga" and hot yoga so we can sweat and burn calories, and not practice slowing down, using the breath to initiate the pose and become present to what the pose is telling us.

We want to get the "yoga body" and follow the hollywood stars to achieving a certain look of leanness. When we could be connecting to our bodies and realizing how amazing they already are, right now in this moment.

Yoga isn't about burning calories, or "getting advanced". It isn't about stretching further and getting it all right. There really isn't something to get done in Yoga.

It's about being in the moment and awakening to who and where you are right this moment.

That requires a great attention to staying present and in the moment on the mat. It requires listening to what your body is telling you. Yoga asks that we still the mind, through the conscious awareness of our life line - the breath and realize we are way beyond the mind chatter upstairs.

Yoga can hurt you if YOU allow the your ego to take over and convince you of its thoughts.

That you aren't "doing enough, sweating enough, flowing enough, standing on your head enough. The mind will try to take you away from where you are, to where it thinks it should be. Yoga helps us listen beyond that mind noise and hear the stronger, voice of truth within.

Let go of getting anywhere.

Listen to the sensations of your body on the mat. Never go beyond a comfortable stretch or tension, and breath into each and every pose. If you are feeling even slightly in pain, you are not respecting where you are at. Pain is not the response we want to feel when in the pose.

You do want to feel something releasing, and expanding, or lengthening in a way you normally don't. But you never want to feel pain.

Yoga teachers also can hurt you!

So be wary of who you allow as your teacher. There are yoga teachers that simply cannot let go of their own ego. They want to see their students progress and be the one who got them there.

They may think because they have been practicing 10, 20, 30 years that they "know yoga" or even more ego maniacal, they ARE Yoga. I once heard the owner of a very well known yoga studio in Toronto say that to her employee. Scary and completely an ego driven attitude.

The point of the practice is to gain awareness.

Awareness of our habits, our tendencies, what is going on in the body, and what the mind is doing. It is to "awaken" us to really becoming present and there for ourselves.

Yoga heals. Yoga isn't failing to heal our pain. We are failing to listen to the voice within and follow that lead.

If you allow the presence within to guide you, then healing happens. If you also develop a relationship with it so that you respect its most powerful voice, then you heal infinitely from that pure awakening.

In health always,


Friday, January 13, 2012

Hungry for food or something else? Disordered eating is not just about food.

Our relationship to food says a lot about the relationship we have with ourselves. How we see food, and treat it can be a direct reflection about how we see and treat ourselves.

When we use it to avoid a unpleasant feeling such as sadness, we are also neglecting ourselves. When we use it to distract ourselves, we also send the message to our bodies and spirit that our true needs aren't important. When we use it to fill a void, or emptiness we actually are denying ourselves true nourishment and love.

Disordered eating and food issues are not only about food

Food is therefore, not just a fuel source. It often is bound to our emotions, cultural upbringing and socialization process. So understanding how eating disorders have emerged isn't so hard.

Food can represent love when given to us by care providers as we are growing up.

Food symbolically represents our will to live and thrive.

Food can be used to exert control and power over ourselves and in our lives. We may feel more secure when we control our food such as when we diet, because at least we've got that "working" in our lives.

Food can be a negatively charged trigger because past memories can arise when we feel certain emotions or sensations of pain and fear.

We may either turn to food to numb the feeling, or we run away from food and encourage another distraction to lessen the pain.

Those who reject food, limit it and restrict it severely to the point of inducing a famine state, are actually rejecting life. Almost like a slow suicide. The will to live regresses to the point of death if critical intervention isn't taken.

My own story

On a personal level, I dealt with eating disorders from my late teens and throughout my twenties. The particulars aren't what is of importance. It was my own coping mechanism, similar to a drug addict or gambler, or alcoholic who is trying to survive living from the outside in, instead of from the inner core.

My darkest moments were probably just before commencing my Homeopathic studies. I had to meet that low right in the face before stepping on the road to recovery. I was lucky. I could have really put my life in danger.

But one very profoundly transformative day, that started as the most painful day from hell actually was a calling from my suffering soul. I literally got down on my knees, and heard an inner voice tell me I wasn't alone or meant to die. I was given the strength somehow to climb out of the darkest abyss I had ever faced.

Seems intense.

It was and I actually am VERY gracious everyday for that dark time. It brought me to truly AWAKEN and experience an internal place so beautiful that words are just not sufficient to describe it.

It took me years to truly embrace my eating disorder and to heal.

I hated it, I tried disowning it, ignoring it, running away from it and it only got fiercer. I am truly lucky I didn't turn to conventional medications as my M.D at the time had suggested. I knew the answer was not in a drug.

The answer was within. The answer was Core Connection.

Only when I could give my eating disorder compassion, just as you would for a small innocent child who has made a mistake, did I heal and recover my health. It was like magic.

The moment I gave myself love, instead of rejection, I healed.

The moment I gave my feelings recognition and the opportunity to be felt instead of repressed, I healed.

The moment I stopped blaming my family, media and men for having the eating disorder, I healed.

At the time I didn't realize that I actually was discovering Core Connection. I was implementing practices I was learning from homeopathic college, reading Buddhist literature everyday, I began to meditate and practice Yoga and my life CHANGED so amazingly and offered me a truly transformative process of awakening. I discovered my Higher Self and its' voice and most powerful nature.

I may not be completely at peace with food, or my body image but I have come a very long way. I am more aware of my reactions and I now have a "spiritual" tool box of practices and skills that have replaced old limiting and negative coping strategies. I credit my recovery to divine intervention and to the LOVE I have been able to allow myself to accept and give to others.

From the darkness we can come out the other side and meet our Light. From our place of pain we can discover our immense strength. From our suffering we can hear the answers that will heal our souls.

We need to let go and allow our inner direction to guide us.

If there is any demand that healing places on us, it is to LOVE LOVE LOVE ourselves unconditionally.

I am a living testimony of this. We can truly regain our health, our power and our lives when we make the Core Connection.

We are never alone on our journey.


Health always,



Thursday, January 12, 2012

What is Reiki and can it help you heal?

In a world where tactile gratification ranks high and "seeing is believing" motto rules, the concept of energy healing becomes quite controversial.

You and I can't see energy. So how can someone heal with energy or be a channel of the transference of healing energy? Well look to the sages, the shamans, the Zen monks, the Mother Teresa's and John of Gods in the world and it is not so hard to believe.

I and millions of others have experienced such healing. The experience of having energy bodywork is truly not only a healing, but a gateway to connecting to your own innate, most powerful and amazing internal mechanism to heal.

And that is what Reiki is all about. In all energy healing, it is not really the hands of the practitioner healing you, it's more how you are enabled to connect to your own healing capability.

That capability is truly in everyone. We just aren't taught that. We aren't told that. And we definitely aren't learning that from the conventional medical community. They would call it airy fairy woo woo quackery.

Is Reiki quackery?

Not from my experience working with the hundreds of patients and clients both in my practice and hospice work. Even Dr. OZ now endorses his wife's practice of Reiki as being a very viable form of healing therapy.

Have all my clients been "cured". No.

Have they felt better, regained some insight about their dis-ease, lifestyle and emotions? Has the internal spirit been ignited to begin the process of healing? Do they begin to question what needs to be changed in their life, and let go of what isn't ADDING to their life? Do they leave the session feeling more safe in their process, more empowered and touched?

Does all of this lead to:

  • a stronger immunity
  • higher energy levels
  • less colds and flus
  • more vigor
  • more enthusiasm and passion in their life
  • weight loss, lessening of chronic disease symptoms, less bouts of depression, more confidence in their work, relationships, and personal progress in life?


What is Reiki?

Reiki is a hands on therapeutic type of energetic body work. The practitioner lays their hands on various positions on the body and helps to clear the energetic meridians and chakras of stagnation, stress and holding on patterns. It originated in Japan, by a Doctor called Usui Reiki. He was a deeply aware and holistic practicing doctor. He knew the power of touch, and how the universe offers its healing energy through us.

After many years of personal work and meditation he developed "Reiki" and it has been brought forth through a very long lineage, carried on much like the oral traditions would pass on stories. He taught students, and then students practiced and became proficient and taught other students.

Reiki being a very tactile form of energy therapy presents to the western world a more believable form of energy bodywork, rather than say Pranic or psychic distance healing where the hands are not even placed on the body at all.

Touch is healing!

I do believe that there is also the human touch factor that makes Reiki all that more powerful for healing and balancing our stress and immune response. When a baby is born, if it is not held, touched and essentially shown loving affection it may fail to thrive, and even die. This is a proven fact.

So the power of touch cannot be undervalued. A Reiki session becomes a very sacred interaction between practitioner and client. The practitioner must leave their ego, their mind stuff at the door so to speak, and be completely focused on the patient before them. The patient must be open and accepting of the shift that needs to take place.

It is an interaction that must be built on mutual trust, acceptance and a willingness to heal on the part of the recipient. You must be ready to let go of what is not serving you in life to ultimately heal your dis-ease. You must be willing to change.

May you make Reiki a part of your healing process and find relief and happiness on your healing journey.



You don't have to Shut Your Mind off to Meditate- Learn 3 simple tools to help your meditation practice

Having one point of focus is the fundamental necessity to still the mind. The "monkey" mind as it is often referred to in the Buddhist and eastern philosophical circles, is just as the label implies, jumpy and erratic.

It will jump from idea to thought to belief, just as our ape friends hang from branch to branch in the jungle. Mind activity is infinite, and that is the very nature of our mind. So I am not suggesting that we need to change it so much so our reaction to it.

Allow the mind to do its thing. But notice the thoughts, and try to observe them rather than become engaged to them in a manner that pulls you out of conscious awareness.

This takes practice and a willingness to believe in your process.

It won't happen overnight. Your mind is so gifted at throwing at you all kinds of thoughts that then become scenarios, that then become almost entire story lines. We get so pulled into the story, that we lose our connection to the awareness lying beneath the automatic thought patterns. This is what is called delusion, or total identification with the Ego mind.

So "Core Connection" brings us to awaken from this delusion and realize we are not our thoughts, or what the mind would like to make us believe we are. We are the essence that observes that mind doing the monkey thing.

That is the key.

Confused a little? This may sound very abstract, so really the only way to truly experience this practice is to practice.

How do we "Core Connect"?

To simplify things (at least for those of you who are beginning meditation and just discovering you are on a spiritual path), begin with the following 3 key practices and begin finding stillness and some relief from your mind matters.

1) Stop and get still:

It is really plain and simple. You need to make time, even 5 minutes in the beginning is a great start. You need to stop your physical body, and sit preferably crossed legged on a pillow or chair. We are a society of multi tasking addicts, and that encourages us to never truly be focused and still. So shut off the cell, the computer, and stop moving and DOING. You are thus learning the art of BEING.

2) Choose the breath as your FOCUS:
So just because you sat your arse down, doesn't mean the mind will follow and stop. Actually, it may appear to be even more active, only because you aren't moving and distracting yourself with a hundred other things. So the answer is to choose a FOCUS. One solitary thing to feel and experience. The breath is most effective focal point you can choose.

3) The quality of the breath:
So what do I mean by focusing on the breath? I give entire workshops on this specific tool or process. For now just choose one QUALITY of the breath to focus on. So you may want to feel the temperature of the inhale and how it differs from the exhale. You may want to just feel the expansion of every inhalation and the opposite sensation of the contraction of the exhalation. Or simply listening to the breath.

As you practice you develop more steadiness and can incorporate other ways. Such as inhaling a feeling, such as gratitude and then exhaling joy back to the space. This is a type of Shambhala inspired technique I learned . Just choose something you feel comfortable with.

The goal is not to stop thinking.

To get "somewhere" or get "good at meditating". That is all ego crap. The goal is simply to be present and aware of what your mind is doing, BUT without getting pulled into it and lost in the charge of the thoughts your mind will put forth.

Watch, observe, and watch some more. Be still and present for yourself. That is meditation in a nutshell.

Questions? Ask away!

For now happy sitting,



Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Solo and directed

I'm single, solo and a one woman show. It sometimes feels really hard going at it alone. But am I actually alone?

No. I have a great social network of friends and solid family support. I'm not alone for the holidays, or to the parties I'm invited to, my hospice work definitely reminds me of my connection to humanity, and my work is constantly engaging me in new relationships and professional networks.

No I'm not alone. But I do get lonely.

Or perhaps more accurately my mind would like me to believe I'm lonely and in need of a partner. And yes having one isn't bad, but sometimes it doesn't necessarily mean it's better.

There is an italian expression my amazing sicilian grandmother used to always say to me, "meglio sola che mal accompagnata". Translated: Better to be alone than in bad company. She never pressured me to get married and get on with it. Definitely an aware woman.

Sometimes we need to go at it alone. It's one way the Universe tests us. It's a toughie for sure. But it teaches us we are self sufficient, and we realize we are able to live this crazy life with our inner strength and spirit as our mode de operandi and not from external influences.

Ask any single mom, widow, divorcee or thirty something that often is surrounded by mommies and daddies whose ego likes to convince them their life is richer, sacrificial and more noble than someone who hasn't decided to go that route, what it feels like. It's not the easiest lesson, but once you learn it's so darn gratifying.

Believing being solo is sad is the Ego. It's Ego's BS. Plain and simple.

Being solo doesn't mean someone is less giving or less generous. Mother Teresa is a prime example. We choose to devote ourselves to what we feel is worthy and what matters most.

Well that would be the enlightened way.

Unfortunately many feel they need to have the corporate job, be the supermom or dad domestically and otherwise, have the 3 car garage, have 3 kids, the million dollar home they rarely live in and the shiny big SUV.

This is the "I" or the ego that wants this identity. But if that means you are miserable in the process, fighting with your spouse, hardly able to spend quality time with those 3 kids and partner, and have barely enough time to sit in your million dollar home, who are you really fulfilling?

My good friend Vicki said to me yesterday, "You can be lonely, and miserable solo. Or you can be "solo and directed". There is a difference.


We can choose to live single or solo, and yet be directed from our inner essence. That could be the most gratifying life possible. Because you live from your authentic Self, living your purpose and ultimately doing WHAT MATTERS MOST to you and fulfilling our obligation to the bigger picture.

You can give to your community, and those who are in need the love, support and food they need to survive and not feel alone. Then you realize your potential to make a difference on this planet, that goes beyond the house, cars and Louis Vittons on our shoulders.

That's not to say you can't do that with a partner by your side, a family, and the white picket fence deal. You just have to come from an authentic intention about why you want those things in your life. Is it for you, or your mama and papa, is it because your girlfriends have it, society tells you that is what is "normal" and you won't be "someone" if you don't have it?

Every word, thought and action must be congruent with your truth and purpose for living.

Otherwise you are living a facade. You are faking your happiness and that ultimately boils down to being the impostor you have to live with. Then you are really solo and undirected.

I'd rather be solo, and directed.



Thursday, January 5, 2012

Dis-ease: Why do we get sick? Learn how to prevent and heal disease!

Within the past few months, several of my family members and a few friends have been diagnosed with certain illnesses and pathologies. Even though I work with chronically ill and terminal patients, I never am immune to feeling compassion and a sense of confusion. When it hits home, it is all the more distressing. It seems to bring to the surface a sense of feeling things are just so unjust, and "don't make sense".

But they do. It is what is presently needing ATTENTION.

Disease often and unfortunately, awakens people to what needs attention, care and ultimately LOVE. So I will go as far as to state, that disease results when we have lost AWARENESS in our lives. The awareness of our body, our mind, and most importantly our spirit.

And when we have not consciously connected to our higher Self.

I nor alternative medicine can explain the exact cause or reason as to why we get sick or develop terminal disease. There is no one explanation because every human being is as diverse as the snowflakes that fall from the sky.

However we all embody a "Vital Force", which is a term I learned in Homeopathic College. This "force" is not a woo woo new age term. It is what animates you. It is what differentiates you, a living being from a dead body.

Historically it was thought that the heart is what was responsible for keeping us alive. Yes, it is a vital organ that is central to our health and wellness. However, what is it that keeps that heart ticking? What allows your heart to emit electrical impulses. pump your blood and oxygen throughout your body?

Hard to define when you can't see the vital force, measure it or put it in a test tube. But it lies at the very core of your being, and is responsible for keeping you in homeostasis or balance so that you heal and even prevent disease.

So why then do people get cancer? Get a heart attack and suffer chronic pain and degeneration?

I believe that disease is a result or manifestation of a long standing disharmony within. Yes there are cases where children fall ill and genetic disorders cause physiological derangements which lead to illness.

But let's put those cases aside and look at the majority of chronic illness and disease.

Disease is a result of an accumulation of not being Core Connected. What causes us to be disconnected to our higher Self?

  • Repression: When we don't honour our emotions, by releasing them in healthy ways we develop disease.

  • When we live in isolation, or with feelings of hopelessness and being unsupported we may develop disease.

  • When we reject our Truth and our Soul's calling to live our life purpose because we allow others or even our own resistance to get in the way, we develop disease.

  • When we live with resentment or anger towards others or ourselves we develop disease.

  • When we act out of greed, dishonesty, and unloving intentions towards others, we may develop disease.

  • When we feed our bodies dead food, void of nutrition and unconscious about where or how the food came to our plate, we may develop disease.

  • When we don't move our bodies, and feel the vitality within on a consistent basis in healthy ways, we may develop disease.

  • When we turn to alcohol, drugs, and other addictions negating our true need for love, we may develop disease.

  • When we can't offer our partner intimacy based on mutual respect, honesty and love, we may develop disease.

  • And ultimately at the core is the level of Love in our lives. When we first and foremost don't love ourselves, berate, degrade and sell ourselves out for others we may develop disease. When we can't love others without conditions and from a genuine place of giving we may develop disease.

Strengthening the Vital Force with Intention

Cultivating AWARENESS is the key.

Be conscious of what you are saying to yourself everyday.

Be conscious of your emotions and the sensations that come with them.

Be conscious of your words, actions and thoughts. For they all impact every cell, atom and part of your being. Every time you disown a part of yourself, by not being true to you, you are giving your immune system a harmful hit.

Give it words of praise, compassion and love and watch how your whole state and being changes. You say yes to Life. You enforce your most awesome Self.

Love and continued Light



Monday, January 2, 2012

It's more than just the Year of the Dragon....Kill the dragon that is sabotaging your life!

We may not all have vast amounts of money, or resources, or powerful networks of people,(yet) but we all do have the same amount of time in a day. Those 24 hours that seem to fly by, are precious and will make or break your efforts to achieve your best year ever.

How are you really spending your time? Social media, phone chats, T.V, endless emails, text messaging, internet and on and on. In short it's called "resistance" or more commonly known as procrastination.

Resistance will try to creep into every nook or cranny of your psyche and mindset.

So everyday you gotta slay that dragon. Resistance is vicious. It breaths the fire of distraction, rationalizations, and just straight out bullshit excuses for not working on your goals. You gotta kill it by sitting the seat of your pants to the seat of the chair, over and over again.

It's not just the year of the Dragon. It's a lifetime of dragons.

Because guess what? That dragon resurrects every single morning, right after you open your eyes and take that first conscious breath. Actually just like in video games it has INFINITE LIVES!

I haven't been consistent with this. I'm fessing up because the only way I am going to achieve anything worth achieving in this life, is with integrity and commitment.

So I sat down and really evaluated what I as doing with my 24 hours. Things seriously need revamping.

As I started getting serious with where I want to go with my goals in life, it became sooooo apparent that time was a huge factor interfering with my success. I thought resources or money was. But actually that is just scarcity thinking. Abundance truly is our birth right.

My time management changes in 2012:

1) In bed by 10pm, and up by 6, at least during the week!

I'm committing to getting in bed earlier, getting at least 7 hours, and waking up earlier to meditate on my day's goals. AND the 30 minutes before I head to lala land, are going to be positive thoughts, visualizations and prayers of gratitude.

Gotta slay that dragon before you go to dreamland and help the subconscious work on what you WANT in life, not the crap. Your brain doesn't stop working when you sleep. And your creative process does a hell of a lot of work during sleep time. So make sure you put AMAZING feeling thoughts into your head before you fall asleep. You give it the food it needs to work on your desires and aspirations.

Kinda similar to the next one...

2) The first 60 minutes of my day must be dragon proof:

What you do with the first hour right after you open those pretty eyes of yours will make or break the whole rest of the day. Do you get that? It is CRUCIAL and imperative that you take the first hour of your day and truly gear your mindset against that flame breathing monster.

I'm waking up smiling, and forcing it if I have to. I'm meditating on how awesome my life is because of it's abundance. I'm literally counting every fricken' blessing and feeling that resonate within me. I'm connecting to my higher power, asking for guidance and support to make it a kick ass day. I'm also inviting my creative subconscious to inspire me for my greatest and highest good. I'm reading my goals 3 times, that are written and sitting on my nightstand. I'm throwing in a little visualization as I ask, and pray. I'm seeing all that I desire my reality to be.

Call it airy fairy or whatever. But this stuff works. I know it does, because when I am consistent with this, I see RESULTS. My goal is to get real consistent. No need to beat yourself up if one day you just can't do it. But overall, this has got to be the deal.

3) Less Facebook, less Bbm, less emails, less time spent with people who aren't adding substance to my life and more connecting with those that do.

Pretty self explanatory. I'm not checking email or going online till I get at least one hour of work, writing or something on my task list done. I don't watch T.V, or many DVDs. Those hours are spent working out or yoga, making time to eat healthy and seated at a table, educational or career seminars and community outreach.

I also will not subject myself to chatting with drama queens, negative Nancys and people who don't resonate. The quality of my energy on a consistent basis is critical. Those individuals are dragons in disguise. Cut them loose and make positive, better connections with people in your life. Find people who ELEVATE you, and bring you to higher place.

No joke, this is the battle plan.

You got to psyche yourself up so HIGH that you are confidence incarnate.

Here is to 2012 with better habits, connections, relationships and a true commitment to the dreams. Dragons are gonna die each day. You in for this battle?


Love and Light,